#25- A Key to Shaking Your Past
by Cory MacNeil

Maybe you're sick and tired of winter and thinking about the days to come when you can fire up the grill again and take a dip in the pool.  Having just come back from Miami, I can assure you awesome weather is on the way and you'll be smiling again soon.  How can you be sure?  You can be sure because of what's happened in the past.  They're called seasons and they are as predictable as the rising and setting of the sun.  Today, we'll unpack that idea some more and see why it's so important to you as you map your future.

Here's a snippet from my book on writing to get us started.

Backstory is Powerful!

With it, you may write the next great American novel.  Without it, you’ll have no idea why your main character Bob really chose Alaska with it’s voracious bugs and even more voracious Grizzly Bears!  When he hits his thumb with his hatchet you know what he’ll say before he says it.  When he decides to leave the woods and hitchhike back to talk with the authorities in Toledo, Ohio you’ll know why.

Until then, here’s a tip.  Your reader doesn’t need to know the entire backstory behind “The Untimely Death of Backwoods Bob.”  You will know and you will share as you see fit.  Remember, you don’t just hook a fish, you have to keep her on the line.  I know what I would have happen to Backwoods Bob on his way back to Toledo, Ohio- but I’ll let you figure that one out for yourself.

In the meantime, let it suffice to say that not only are some people born in a barn, some people die of Cancer while on their way to confess a crime they committed twenty years ago!  But not “Backwoods Bob”, he died on the bus of gangrene from the wood chopping accident one mile outside of Toledo.  

Which leads us to consider what must happen to every character ever written about- they must develop.

The preceding paragraphs are from my book "Set the Hook!  5 Powerful Storytelling Secrets."  I hope these words not only inspire you, but bring out the best in you as you try and decipher your own life story.

Backstory is what makes others interesting when we meet them.

Backstory makes everyone you meet interesting.  Chances are if you're taking people for granted, you've forgotten the fact that everyone has a story to tell and each one is different.

We love stories!  What better way to feed our love than listening to others.  

Tweet this!  "Too often, however, we do too much talking and too little listening and then we prescribe cures without thoroughly diagnosing the symptoms."

So what is your backstory?  Is it exciting?  Depressing?  Heartbreaking?  Take some time and reflect, then map out your plan for the future.  Sometimes the past makes a great rudder for navigating the oceans which lie ahead.  Rather than beating yourself up for past mistakes, determine to be wiser in the future.  Count loss in the past as a gain in the form of an education.  You get the idea!

If you've enjoyed this post, please be sure to check out previous ones.  You can find the links below.  And, if you're a writer or an artist of any sort, you can buy my book "Set the Hook!  5 Powerful Storytelling Secrets", by clicking the link to the right of this article.  In the meantime, stay tuned for more blurbs to come!  

#24- The 'New' Commodity
by Cory MacNeil

This past week we took a cruise to the Bahamas and experienced some of the best customer service ever.  Sadly, the people who waited on us make very little in the way of monetary compensation.  However, on the upside, they are able to take what money they make and live very well in the countries they come from.  That, in my opinion, is a good thing.  The bad thing is that they work seven days a week for 6-7 months and put in very long days.  I admire their strong work ethic but just wish there was an easier way for them.  To make matters worse, you prepay all of your tips when you cruise and don't know where your dollars are actually going.

So how do you meet the needs of others beyond giving them cash?

In his classic book 'The Five Love Languages', Dr. Gary Chapman suggests the following ways:

1.  Acts of Kindness.
2.  Time.
3.  Touch.
4.  Words of Affirmation.
5.  Gifts.

• 
  

Chapman rightly argues that different people require different forms of love.  My own personal love language (when I feel most loved by others) occurs when others make time for me and use words of affirmation.  What is yours?

Some of you may feel loved when your spouse serves you breakfast in bed.

Some of you may feel loved when your Dad opts out of golf with his buddies to help you fix your kitchen sink.

Some of you may feel loved when someone you care about hugs you or puts their arm around you.

Some of you may feel loved when someone you esteem highly says: "Great Job!'.

And some of you feel loved when you receive a new ring or gift card from somebody.

Tweet this!  Ultimately, love has always been and will continue to be our greatest commodity.  We may run out of money, but we have an abounding source of something more precious than gold if we'll only learn to live and love creatively.

So how did I love on the people who served me while cruising?  Eventually, my burden for and appreciation of them caused me to tip them above and beyond what I prepaid.  However, aside from what I did for them financially, I gave them the best that I had to offer in the form of kindness and respect.  By the end of the trip I truly felt as though they were friends.

On a good note, while tipping our cabin attendant I learned he was finishing his tour today and heading home for a couple of months to visit his wife and two young daughters!  To say I was excited for him would be an understatement.  Why?  Because he had loved my family this week by ensuring that our cabin was well kept and organized.

The love we have and share with others can be traced back to it's source in God.  "God SO loved the world, that He GAVE us Jesus!".  God also says if we believe, He will give us the POWER to become the sons of God!".

As sons, we are like the Father who makes it rain on the just and the unjust.  Unlike, MOST, we are to return good for ill.  How can we do this?  Perhaps a better question is 'How can we not?"

Chances are, you've encountered someone who is unloveable today or this past week.  I promise that if you haven't you will SOON!  Write it down.  When you do, you'll be challenged (should you accept the challenge) to learn that person's love language and speak accordingly.  As my good friend and pastor Roscoe Lilly is fond of saying: "WE CAN'T LEAD OUR ENEMIES TO CHRIST!"  The best way to defeat your enemy is to make him or her your friend.

If I ever cruise again, I've made the decision to save ahead of time so that I will have copious amounts of cash to bless those who serve me.  You may not be in a position to do that yourself, but I pray that regardless of where you go, you will be alert and sensitive to the ways God is trying to love others through you, be it via smile, handshake, kind words, etc.  An amazing transformation is waiting in the wings for those who attempt to increase our Gross National Product of Love!

May the Lord bless you and make His face to shine upon you all the days of your life.

If you've enjoyed this article, check out some of the others.

#23- Life Is Not About......
by Cory MacNeil

Life is not about the deer!  There, I feel better now because I've been wanting to say that all week.  Let me explain.  Last weekend my son was watching an old, old, old video of my deceased grandfather along with my dad and a friend watching herds of deer being fed corn in the depths of winter.  Naturally, the deer were the stars of the show....back then that is, now that my grandfather is gone I kept praying the cameraman would stop videoing the deer and get some shots of my grandfather.  Eventually he did and I saw him alive once more!  Thus, I want to say it's not about the deer.

Fast forward a couple of days and I learned that a man famous in the world of deer hunting died at the age of 60 in his sleep.  Ugggg.  Lane Benoit was not only a great deer hunter, but bubbling over with life and enthusiasm.  Again, it's not about the deer.  We were at the Big E in Springfield and we asked Lane for directions to one of the booths.  He started to explain then just said "Follow me!."  How can you not like that kind of guy?

Chances are you don't hunt deer.  But are there any things that have gotten your attention other than people.  I realize people can be a real pain in the neck and all, but each one of us is a miracle.  Anyone who has lost a friend or loved one knows exactly what I'm talking about.

Fast forward to last night.  I was listening to Rob Bell's first podcast called Robcast and he talked about how Moses walked by the bush and it was burning.  Rob said some people believe it was always burning, it was just the first time Moses noticed it.  I don't care what you think about that take to be perfectly honest.  But I have noticed that you can go through life and never see the miracles all around you.  In fact, people are like burning bushes that we never take notice of.  Why?  Because we never notice the obvious.  We're blind that way.

After this week's events I just wanted to go to the Jesus room and worship for awhile.  That's a good thing.  SO into the living room I went and sat in front of the burning bush for awhile and it was GLORIOUS!

Fast forward some more to tomorrow.  Tomorrow I head for a cruise to the Bahamas with four amazing people- my family.  I'm sooo looking forward to spending some major quality and quantity time with the loves of my life.  Never before have I appreciated my family as much as I do in these latter seasons.  We even went the extra mile and got a balcony!  Why?  Because I care more about my family than I do the money.

Speaking of seasons, I've reached a new one myself.  In my new season I'm going to be ME.  You can take me or leave me.  Either way, I'll still love you.

So, in the days to come, you will agree or disagree with me.

In the days to come, you will love me and hate me sometimes.

In the days to come, you will criticize my work and look right past me most of the time, but I'm not going to keep my light under a bushel basket.

In the days to come, you may not see or talk to me before I go home to glory, but I promise you this.  One day you will cry when you attend or hear about my funeral and I'll do the same when I hear about yours.

Tweet this: "I'm ready for the 2.0 version of myself and I hope the world is too!"

SO what I'm doing today is this.  I'm not dead (yet) so every day I want to do the things that would make me cry at my own funeral if I were to die today.  Complicated, I know, but I think we're onto something.

Paul said: "I die daily".  I think he realized how immanent death was and lived each moment to the fullest in close connection with a personal God who loved him beyond measure.  You see, it's not so much about death as it is life.  Life is not about stuff or things, or trophies, it's about God and people.  Everything is going to burn up one day, but we last FOREVER, SOMEWHERE!  As Steve Brown would say: "You think about that!".

Getting back to the deer, I'm the guy sitting farthest back in the row and the others are family and friends.  I'll admit I still like getting a deer.  But what's more important are the guys in the photo with me.  They're one of a kind, genuine, special, kind- they're my friends.  They're the ones I may miss someday, not the deer.  Deer are temporary- souls are eternal.  So again, I want to say life is not about the deer- they're just the consolation prize.

#22- Are You Manipulating People?

There's a lot of talk these days about adding value to the lives of others.  The underlying premise is that if you continually bless people they will feel the need to reciprocate.  So then, the underlying reason for you to help someone is because there will be some kind of PAYBACK.  Did you hear alarms going off while you read the last sentence?

The conundrum is as follows.

1.  Many of us are not comfortable with the idea that we may be manipulating someone.  

2.  Many of us desire to go the 'extra mile' for others, but are concerned that we may take advantage of someone in the process.

In summary, we want to shine and go the extra mile but we do not want to hurt people in the process.

These ideas seem simple on the surface, but anyone who has treaded these deep waters understands the dilemma.

Should we stop being a blessing to others?  Of course not.  However, if you battle with feeling manipulative there is hope.  Now if you are manipulative, that's a whole other issue.  

Naturally, SOME people will feel a need to reciprocate when you customize your services to meet their needs to a tee.  Ironically, many will not.  Either way, the response of others should not stop us from going above and beyond the call of duty in our daily travels.  Regardless of our station in life, we have the OPPORTUNITY to do our very best everyday under all circumstances.  I don't know about you, but I think that's good news!  We can all be artists.

You heard me right.  When we serve with excellence, we will receive paybacks but we also have the opportunity to create art.  Moses shared this idea when he captured the masterpiece we call Creation in the book of Genesis.  God creates 'good and beautiful things' for others and so can we.

Again, when you start adding value in the lives of others you will and should receive compensation in some cases.  Paul said that he who sows spiritual things should receive carnal things in return from those they serve.  However, while people can deny you compensation for your services, they CANNOT deny you the pleasure you receive when you do something well.  In fact, for many artists, the feeling of accomplishment far outweighs the monetary rewards.  For instance, have you ever considered the fact that visual art can be readily distributed at no cost to the consumer and no material gain to the artist?  You see this in branding.  For example, you can walk down the aisle of the grocery store and admire branding- for example the script on a can of Coke- and not make a purchase.  When you do, the artist who created the brand receives no payment, yet his work endures for years.

While your fellow man may not compensate you for your continual efforts, you can rest assured that you will be rewarded some how, some way, for your continual efforts when you go about doing good.  Why?  Because when we sow bountifully, we reap bountifully.

Maybe you know of someone who has been recognized by others for their continual excellence in service, yet you've failed to bless them despite the fact they've enriched you.  Rather than being jealous, you might consider recognizing them in some way, be it a letter, or email, phone call, etc.  Perhaps you might even be led to repay them for their services in some way.

In the meantime, stop feeling guilty about doing excellent work and go out and be artistic.